I know it has been a while since everyone saw posts from me, and I am sorry about that fact. Despite the inconsistency, thank you for checking back in and sticking with me. I do not want to get too specific since we would be here forever, but I do want to let you guys have a clue as to why I was absent for the past few weeks.
The primary reason for my recent absence: mental health. Now, mental health is a topic I do not shy from here. I like to be open so there is continuous conversation about it when so many people shut the discussion down, and this includes when I feel far from great. I just got out of what felt like a month-long spiral due to one thing or another happening right after each other. To say I did not handle the month well is a major understatement. I slid back into terrible, self-destructive habits without any conscious recognition of the fact, which makes me feel…well, crappier. (I could not think of a nicer word to use that would portray the negativity properly.) Hooray for binge eating and mindlessly killing your wallet!
It is tiresome trying to wade through rough waters when you never received any proper support items to keep you above water and must seek them out on your own. It is even more tiring knowing there are better ways to handle life’s obstacles and beating yourself up over coping “wrong” even though you know negatively judging yourself is more counter-productive. (That was enough of a doozy to read, I am sure; now, imagine that going on in your mind nearly 24 hours a day.) With all of that happening in one’s mind, I guess it is no wonder keeping up on a consistent post schedule falls to the back burner.
Things seem to be looking up (at least for now), so here I am once more. Regular Monday, Wednesday, and Friday posts are coming back to you as I figure out the next best steps to continue my mental and personal growth. (Mental fog-inducing moments like these remind me there is always room for improvement and that I still have a ways to go toward healing 13 years worth of messed-up brain.) I also plan on starting poetry readings both in person and on my Instagram stories. Also, regarding the hyperlink – I still have my personal Instagram page for blogging and my life; I just made a profile specifically for my poetry (which is my passion). The new book will also hopefully be out by Halloween, but that is up in the air still.
Thank you again for checking back in and waiting for me. I am so used to no one missing me, so you help heal that part every time you come back and care about what I do and what I create. I love you, you fellow bookworms!